Xanth eXamined
01/07/1999 . Source: Jessica Martin 
Will Piers Anthony's magic be eXterminated? Have you heard of Piers Anthony? Sure you have. Big best-selling fantasy and scifi author. Probably best known for his popular pun-filled works of light hearted fantasy - the Xanth series, where the magical Kingdom of Xanth and its ruling family and friends struggle to keep the magic in the place, despite being linked by an on-and-off dimensional gateway to Earth. Well, for Piers, some clouds have a lead lining. His series sells by the bucket-load out in the States, and have made old Piers a tidy pile of loot. Well, at least compared to most authors, who haven't progressed beyond the low mid-list and eating dog food stage yet. But poor old Piers. He is unhappy. Word reaches us at the Nest that he has bought into the biggest lie of all time. What can this be, we hear you clamour? The check is in the post? But honey, it's not lipstick on my shirt, it's tomato sauce? Honest, officer, I have only been parked on the yellow line for a minute? No, none of these fibs have - to the best of our knowledge - taken in our Piers. The porky pie he fell for is the famous internet adage: If you build it, they will come. He has created a new site, www.hipiers.com and has been very disappointed by the lack of millions of visitors who have not been beating a path to his virtual door. It's a common problem. What with the internet gold rush going on a-pace and all those IBM flaming logo e-commerce adverts on TV, suggesting that the mere addition of an extra web page to the current 6000 million-page web mountain will usher in riches and fortune that will make Amazon itself jealous. We have been online since 1996. We're practically the Victorian Harrods of sci-fi on the Net. And we can tell you, this is a very, very large pile of dog droppings. If you are buying into the internet in 1999 with the do no work and get rich quick type mindset, you will get what you deserve. Bankruptcy 101. Personally, we predict the Net Stock madness is going to crash by the New Year or soon after. Yeah, one day soon a real rain is going to come and wash all the scum off the streets. Unfortunately, those streets are populated with real people with real jobs and real kids' shoe bills, and a lot of people - and a lot of share holders - are going to get hurt. But enough of our pre-millennial fears. Back to our fantasy-churning chum, Mr Anthony. Well, Piers, be depressed no longer. We have heard your tail of woe, and have made you our wizard site of the month! Visit his site now and tell the old todger that we sent him your way. 
|
