| Carbon
Creek (Trek) T'Pol tells Trip and Archer about her great-grandmother
T'Mir, who was part of an expedition to Earth that crashed in the 1950s. Vulcans
at Roswell; who would have thought? Carbon
Creek Enterprise Season 2, Episode 2 Teleplay by Chris Black Story by
Rick Berman & Brannon Braga & Dan O'Shannon Directed by James Contner
It's
hard to know where to begin here, really - 'Carbon Creek' fails on so many levels
that it's hard to know which creative wasteland to address first. I suppose one
has to start somewhere, so let's start with the core concept. Having
lived in the L.A. area for ten years before fleeing north in terror, I'm very
familiar with the idea of a 'high-concept' premise: something that can be easily
summed up in a single sentence and that can provide the advertisers with a sure-fire
way to market the episode.
A running joke is that one can turn almost anything
into such a pitch - 'it's like Hamlet, only with gerbils!' is one of my personal
favorites. (And no, that's not referring to anything actually filmed ... I hope.)
In Trek history, the most obvious one coming to mind at the moment would be 'Ferengi
were the Roswell aliens!', used for DS9's 'Little Green Men.' The idea behind
'Carbon Creek,' rather obviously, was 'T'Pol's ancestor was on Earth too!', or
something akin. There's the inevitable danger of playing with 'established' Trek
history, but just on the face of it I'd certainly be willing to give the premise
a look. Unfortunately, this really turned into 'let's screw with history
to absolutely no good end.' Dealing with part of the 'let's screw with history'
part first... So first contact with the Vulcans wasn't when we thought it was
- T'Pol's great-grandmother T'Mir lived in Carbon Creek, Pennsylvania for several
months back in 1957-58, along with crewmates Mestral and Stron. All well
and good - but if the Vulcans were well aware of and interested in Earth back
in the time of Sputnik, why the hell did Zefram Cochrane's warp mission as shown
in 'First Contact' mean a damn? Why did preventing it help the Borg so
much? In many ways, 'Carbon Creek' just went a long way towards invalidating 'First
Contact' ... and given how much I enjoyed said film, this did not exactly raise
the episode in my eyes. All that even assumes the Vulcans would be in a
position to observe the launch of Sputnik. Why would they care about a
single backwater planet launching one satellite? Part of the idea behind 'First
Contact' was that the warp flight is what got the Vulcans' attention and made
us noteworthy - if they're checking out every hick planet with a rocket anyway,
the appeal is rather strongly blunted. But, let's take all that as a given
for the moment. I can live with tweaks to history as we know it if they're plausible,
and if if they're done for a good reason. (Remember, I was quite fond of both
'Acquisition' and DS9's 'Little Green Men,' so it's not as though I have an immediate
bias against all things revisionist.) If it makes us as viewers re-examine our
perspective on Trek history a bit, that's a good reason. If it tells us
something truly enlightening about our characters, that's fine. If I can admire
the creativity with which history was tweaked, I can usually justify it to myself. Did
'Carbon Creek' do any of those things? Not so far as I can see. Instead,
we got a limp collection of 'fish-out- of-water' cliches, 'humanity has more worth
than you think' arguments which we've seen lots of in the 22nd-century already,
all wrapped up in a rather pale imitation of 'October Sky.' In any given
scene, there was almost a guarantee that at least one thing was horribly contrived.
Some contrivances were small, some weren't. A sampling, going more or less chronologically: -
Okay, so when T'Mir and Mestral change clothes, T'Mir happens to oh-so-conveniently
be behind the clothesline so that she's only seen unclothed in silhouette. Coy,
but workable. However, when she then comes out with her dress on backwards and
has to change again, she goes back behind the clothesline to change again. I can't
imagine she's bashful around Mestral given how much time they've spent on a cramped
ship, so who's she hiding from - the cameras? - Similarly ... where'd she
get the high heels? It's not as though shoes are typically hiding on clotheslines... -
Mestral wears a knit cap to cover his pointed ears (gee, y'think we're supposed
to react fondly based on our memories of Spock doing the same thing?), yet T'Mir
simply covers her ears with her hair, when a good strong wind would expose her
to everyone. And don't tell me there wouldn't be any for three months -
this is central Pennsylvania in autumn and winter we're talking about. -
Mestral manages to win them grocery money in several games of pool, saying that
it's based on 'simple geometry' that wouldn't challenge a Vulcan child. I've no
doubt that the game would be trivial for Vulcans to understand, but there's
a huge difference between theory and practice, and I have a lot of doubt that
Mestral would understand all the nuances of the table based on two minutes' observation.
As a physics teacher with a younger brother who's a pool shark, I have
quite a bit of experience distinguishing theory from practice in this particular
area ... if it were just theory, I shouldn't get my head handed to me every time
I play him. :-) - Mestral gets a job in the mines - fine, given that it's
a mining town. However, bumps and scrapes happen in mines. You're telling me that
Mestral never, ever had an accident where he took the skin off a knuckle
and oozed green blood? Trip keeps wondering why no one ever noticed the ears,
which rather conveniently forgets the many other ways Vulcans would show up as
different...
That should suffice to make the point. I kept getting tossed
out of the narrative noticing all the things that were clearly taking place in
Hollywood-Land rather than in what should pass as Trek 'reality.' That doesn't
help make the episode any more enjoyable. Of course, when the narrative
is this thin it's not as though I mind getting tossed out of it. The story, such
as it is, is really 'Vulcans observe 1950s Earth close-up,' and pretty much all
the observations they make are the same ones we've seen several times before,
only more spelled out and less interestingly portrayed. Humans glorify
violence, yet are capable of much compassion. Humans are on the verge of destroying
themselves, yet are on the verge of many breakthroughs. Vulcans don't care for
human culture, yet find 'I Love Lucy' strangely appealing. Vulcan males look like
Moe Howard. There's groundbreaking stuff for you. I did, for the record,
like the conversation between T'Mir and Mestral about violence and the Vulcan
past. It was all pretty old news, but I thought that moment came off pretty well
regardless. And the human residents of Carbon Creek? As I said earlier,
they were basically in a retelling of 'October Sky.' Now, granted, at least the
Trek staffers picked a good story to crib some ideas from ... but I've seen this
before, with far better writing and acting. Hank Harris did just fine as
Homer/Jack, but he's not exactly threatening to steal all the good roles away
from Jake Gyllenhaal. And no, I'm not just saying that because I taught Jake when
he was in middle school. :-) So the humans were basically stock characters
who occasionally got to display a second dimension, and the Vulcans were generally
there to offer warmed-over observations, be mocked by the episode for one reason
or another (the 'Moe' incident being a case in point), or to behave in such an
exceptionally stupid way as to enable another pointless argument. As an
example of the latter, when Mestral sneaks off to a baseball game he tells the
others that he's going to the ship to get a waveform discriminator. He's caught
on the way back, but it's not as though he had one with him to back up his story.
Given all of that, the only answer I can assume was given for 'why screw around
with history in this episode?' is 'because it's there and we can.' You may comfortably
seat me with those distinctly unimpressed folks over there. And we haven't
even gotten to the ending yet. By the end of the episode, I was saying, 'okay,
the only thing that's going to improve this even marginally is if it turns out
this is all T'Pol spinning a shaggy dog story.' Given that such an ending
is the equivalent of 'it was all a dream,' and thus opening the episode up to
charges of 'so an entire episode that didn't even happen,' for me to consider
an ending like that an improvement should give you a hint of how I felt
about it up to that point. So what did we get? We got the 'T'Pol spins a
tale' bit to annoy all those people who don't like the ''twas all a lie' cheat,
and then we got the 'but wait! she's got the purse, so it must have happened!'
twist that everyone saw coming anyway. Let's burn all those bridges there,
boys - no, no, don't leave a single one standing. Hmph. One possible
thing I was hoping for at the end as well is that T'Pol could have had a good
'personal reason' to go to Carbon Creek. Given Vulcan lifespans, it's possible
that Mestral died only recently - which means it would have been very plausible
that T'Pol went to be there to receive his katra and cremate the body. Since her
exact reason for going was never spelled out, I'll just keep that little chunk
of assumed reality in reserve. Some other brief notes: - So
Velcro was invented by Vulcans. I'm starting to wish the 'transparent aluminum'
scene in ST4 had never happened, because I feel it's given carte blanche to scenes
like this. Come on, guys. - Does anyone else have the disturbing feeling
that we could be heading for a revelation that Spock wasn't the first Vulcan-human
hybrid? Mestral does give every impression that he might hang around with Maggie
for a while, and she certainly looks young enough that kids are still a possibility.
(If that revelation ever comes to pass, by the way, don't blame me.) - Trip
remarks early on that the whole thing 'sounds like an episode of the Twilight
Zone.' Oh, and of course the fact that UPN's new 'Twilight Zone' is on immediately
after Enterprise is nothing but the sheerest coincidence. That more or less
wraps it up. I fully intend to assume 'Carbon Creek' was nothing more than a fever
dream the writers put to paper as the result of an undigested bit of potato and
move on. Here's hoping that it's the exception to the season and not the rule. So,
let's sum up: Writing: Generally obvious
scenes filled with lots of bad dialogue, and tortuous let's-f*ck-with-history
playing to no good end. Direction: Generally
flat, the T'Mir/Jack scene in the bar being a minor exception.
Acting:
Hank Harris did fine; he should be calling his agent to avoid such roles in the
future. OVERALL: 2, mostly for the benefit
of a couple of decent scenes. I have no wish to see these events repeated or alluded
to. Timothy W. Lynch. Copyright 2002, Timothy
W. Lynch. All rights reserved, but feel free to ask...This article is explicitly
prohibited from being used in any off-net compilation without due attribution
and express written consent of the author. Walnut Creek and other CD-ROM
distributors, take note.
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